Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Happy Fracking Holiday!

Tonight was just a strange night for cashier's around the world. I don't have solid facts to this exaggeration, but if it was anything like my night...as strange....

Let me start off by saying that I do not celebrate Christmas and will only acknowledge it's existence to small children. It isn't my job to crush their dreams. We'll leave that to the schoolyard bully and/or their own parents. So when people leave my register with a "Merry Christmas!"...I ALWAYS reply, "Happy Holidays."

It is my way of being polite without covering up my beliefs that Christmas is a load of crap and should be banished from history from this day on....

So, I started an experiment to see if I can correctly guess the number of people who will call me out on this. My guess tonight was 3. I was off my 5.

8 people stopped to question my saying, "Happy Holiday's" instead of the traditional greeting. Most were simply curious, but some acted as if I had broken some untold law of St. Nick.

One man in particular thought it would make him seem stoic to question me in front of a line FULL of customers.

"Merry Christmas young lady!"

"Happy Holidays to you sir."

"What?...I'm more of a Merry Christmas kinda guy myself."

"*deep sigh of frustration* Interesting...I'm more of a "Holidays" kinda gal, but we're all different."

"I don't really care what you are...It's technically Christmas...You can't take CHRIST outta Christmas. Our ancestors....Blah...Blah Blah...Blah..."

Another occasion was enough to make me physically laugh out loud , losing my composure completely.

"Merry Christmas!"

"Happy Holidays"

"Can I ask you something?"

"Yes mam. Whatcha' need?"

"Are you being held down by the man?"

Trying despritely not to crack a grin, I squeezed out a "Mam, it is my own personal choice. The only thing the man is holding down is my paycheck."

Needless to say...it was an interesting night.

My question is, "When did America become so one-sided that we can only accept those who fulfill the requirements of the majority and their views?"

Forgive my need for change, but I will continue to say "Happy Holidays" until the 'Man' hands back all the money I've spent on tuition, taxes, gas, and Starbucks coffee.

So from this cashier to you....

Happy Frackin' Holidays!


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